Company of Heroes: Eastern Front

Author Topic: In soviet russia jokes  (Read 186666 times)

Offline UeArtemis

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #120 on: May 12, 2010, 02:37:06 PM »
I believe in one thing only, the power of the human will. © Joseph Stalin

Offline Werwolf

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #121 on: May 15, 2010, 03:44:23 AM »
Soviet
"In Amerika, you shoot wolf.
...in Soviet Russia, wolf shoot you!"

In a remote kolkhoz:
<knock, knock>
Peasant: "Who there?"
NKVD: <short pause> "ahh...OLIGARCH."
<Peasant sighs with relief and opens door>
Peasant: "Come in, come in comra---"
<BANG!>

Modern:
"In Putin-Russia no Facebook, Book Face you!"
« Last Edit: May 15, 2010, 04:06:15 AM by Werwolf »

Wunderwaffen Doctrine: What technology created for us, we drive it towards the enemy.

Offline cephalos

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #122 on: May 15, 2010, 10:36:16 AM »
+1

Offline UeArtemis

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #123 on: May 15, 2010, 03:54:53 PM »
Quote
Modern:
"In Putin-Russia no Facebook, Book Face you!"
"the Russian Facebook" - "Incontact" ("In Touch")  ::)
« Last Edit: May 15, 2010, 04:06:04 PM by UeArtemis »
I believe in one thing only, the power of the human will. © Joseph Stalin

Offline Werwolf

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #124 on: May 15, 2010, 05:21:07 PM »
Quote
Modern:
"In Putin-Russia no Facebook, Book Face you!"
"the Russian Facebook" - "Incontact" ("In Touch")  ::)
hehe, "Facebook" was easier, dunno how I'd go about with "Incontact"  ;D

"With Soviet Russia, n00bs pwn you!"  8)
« Last Edit: May 15, 2010, 05:25:26 PM by Werwolf »

Wunderwaffen Doctrine: What technology created for us, we drive it towards the enemy.

Offline comrade2012

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #125 on: May 18, 2010, 03:40:13 AM »
in Soviet Russia, ass wipe you!!!
"It is better to fight for something than live for nothing." George Patton

Offline Cranialwizard

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #126 on: May 18, 2010, 04:28:51 AM »
In Soviet Russia, you operate on doctor!
"Balancers are 10 a penny"

Offline Werwolf

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #127 on: May 18, 2010, 12:46:33 PM »
got this Russian joke from a friend... I don't know if it's funny or just plainly disturbing. maybe both.

__________________

Man pass playground, see little girl beating something
with stick. He go closer, and horrified sees stick has nail on end, and something is little puppy. Such thing that is pulp of meat, blood and fur used to be puppy some
point.



Man: Girl, girl, what yo...u doing?! Don't you like animals?
Girl: I don't really like people, too.

__________________
« Last Edit: May 18, 2010, 03:24:29 PM by Werwolf »

Wunderwaffen Doctrine: What technology created for us, we drive it towards the enemy.

Offline Cranialwizard

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #128 on: May 18, 2010, 12:59:17 PM »
It's like both at the same time...

Can't imagine a girl beating a puppy to death,

But on the same token "I don't really like people, too" was hilarious (:>
"Balancers are 10 a penny"

Offline Akalonor

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #129 on: May 18, 2010, 06:54:09 PM »
'I don't really like people too' Is where I can relate
but I can't relate to not loving animals .
Molly: " It's our rock garden"
Dwight: "What are you farming, Bullcrap?"

You Are a Rebel Spy and a traitor to the Empire!
~Darth Vader

Any typos found may be given to Seeme.

Offline comrade2012

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #130 on: May 26, 2010, 04:37:08 AM »
In America, your job determines your marks
In Soviet Russia, Marx determines your job

In America, you assassinate the president
In Soviet Russia, the president assassinates you
"It is better to fight for something than live for nothing." George Patton

Offline Versedhorison

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #131 on: May 26, 2010, 04:44:25 AM »
In America, your job determines your marks
In Soviet Russia, Marx determines your job

+1

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Offline ford_prefect

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #132 on: May 26, 2010, 05:41:16 AM »
In America, your job determines your marks
In Soviet Russia, Marx determines your job

In America, you assassinate the president
In Soviet Russia, the president assassinates you
nice I love both of them

Offline Blackbishop

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #133 on: May 26, 2010, 05:46:28 AM »
In America, your job determines your marks
In Soviet Russia, Marx determines your job

In America, you assassinate the president
In Soviet Russia, the president assassinates you
nice I love both of them
Indeed ;D.
Mors Indecepta

Might controls everything, and without strength you cannot protect anything. Let alone yourself...

Offline Akalonor

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Re: In soviet russia jokes
« Reply #134 on: May 28, 2010, 07:31:59 AM »
In soviet Russia , CIA informs you!
Molly: " It's our rock garden"
Dwight: "What are you farming, Bullcrap?"

You Are a Rebel Spy and a traitor to the Empire!
~Darth Vader

Any typos found may be given to Seeme.